Some lessons we just have to learn by experience...

Yesterday, Rooster was sobbing in the living room. Since I had food on the stove, I called over to her from the kitchen to ask what was wrong. She told me that she had made a picture for her brother and that he simply crumpled it up because he did not want it.

Rooster came over so I could give her a hug. I told her I was sorry her picture had been crumpled, but explained that when we give a gift to someone else, they are free to do with it as they wish. Sometimes they are happy with whatever we're offering and sometimes they react like Pig Jr. did. Regardless, once we give something away, it is no longer our concern. I decided against talking to Pig Jr. about finding better ways of saying "No, thank you" whenever he is given something he does not want. Quite possibly, he had already told his sister he did not want her drawing. He has used his words to that effect in the past only to have the proffered drawing thrust upon him anyway.  I am still not sure if that was the "correct" way to handle the situation, but it was the best I could come up with at the time.

This morning, Pig Jr. and I were waiting outside of his school with a few of his friends and their parents. I heard Pig Jr. gasp, and looked up to see him holding a leaf and a friend of his grabbing it from him and tearing it into a zillion pieces. As it transpired, Pig Jr. had offered the leaf to his friend, who did not want it. Because his friend did not want the leaf, he destroyed it.

This time, Pig Jr. was on the receiving end of a negative reaction to a gift. He heard the same spiel Rooster heard yesterday afternoon. Now, when he goes to react negatively to something his sister offers him, he has a point of reference about what that feels like. Experiencing this type of rejection might have hurt his feelings, but I can now point out to him that his sister feels the same way when he crumples up her gift to him. Here's hoping he will apply that knowledge and avoid hurting anyone's feelings when he is the recipient again in the future.