"Are we there yet?"

My least favorite part of the holidays is not actually the cost associated with it. It is the travelling. I am very happy to be at home, and every second I spend away from my residence is a wasted second, as far as I am concerned. Holiday travelling taking even longer than normal makes it even worse.

At least when we travel by car, we have our handy-dandy GPS (by the name of Earl) to keep us company. This also makes it easier to answer the endless stream of "Are we there yet?" that starts when we pull out of the driveway and does not end until Mommy pretends to fall asleep in the front passenger seat of the car or we arrive at our destination, whichever comes first. ("Earl says we should be there in thirty-five minutes. Now let's be quiet so Mommy can take a nap.")

Today's holiday-related travelling had us attempting to drive home just before three o'clock in the afternoon. In theory, this should put us home before rush hour hit. ("Are we there yet?" "Earl says we have an hour left. Just relax!") Unfortunately, the Turnpike had other plans for us, and it took us twice as long to get home as it should have. ("Are we there yet? I think Earl is confused. He keeps changing what time we are supposed to get home." "Earl is trying to figure out how long it will take us if we continue to go this slowly.") While we were sitting and stewing, miserable in our traffic-induced misery, the kidlets kept up a steady stream of complaints about not being home ("Are we there yet?"), being hungry ("I want a snack when we get home. Are we there yet?"), being thirsty ("I want water when we get home. Are we there yet?"), and being horribly cranky ("I'm stuck in a car with three kids that have not stopped complaining, my head hurts, I'm exhausted, and now my brother texted me with video of me spilling water on myself that he is threatening to post on Facebook. Are we there yet?"  Okay, so maybe that last one was me.).

We finally made it home, fed the kidlets a snack, and started the laundry that was necessary in order to have towels so we can shower tomorrow. As we collapsed on our respective chairs and/or couches, the kidlets had a question for their parental units. They wanted to know how long it would be until we could go out again.

I'm thinking it will be about the fourth of never.